죽고 싶단 말 밖에
a worst day.. 22 december
hurts.. its hurt so much.. i can't be strong anymore..
see me im so weak rn.. can i just die? i only wanted to be die..
look in my eyes, do i really look happy?
blame me.. blame me for what i do.. just blame me until forever..
u never care my feelings.. u see me like a things can make people happy..
wait all person see my like that.. hahahahahahahaha im not humans im things..
hahahahaha so funny hahaha, see me im happy im really happy right hahahahaha
i never feel like this before, its gonna be more dark.. its gonna be more n more dark..
im human that r just deserve sad.. lucky.. yea lucky... god, helps me.. i cant stand
anymore.. god why it always me.. its feel like a blood in my heart that r comeout
nonstop.. u don't need me anymore, good la good la.. someone protect u more than
me then blame me then ask me to persuade u then tell me i should appreciate..
good la good.. what so good with love hahahaha tbh i dont like u get close to her
but what to do who i am.. right just a things that people use alot.. haha however
u so lucky la, got a person that really caring about u n protect u like a god woa
so good woa i also cant get that, since u young i know u lucky.. u want know
whos a person that i say deep inside her heart say " she deserve better than him "
its her la.. i can feel she hate me since i talk to her.. oh i know u will say this to her
just say la, i dont care anymore, say until u make my heart hates u not love u..
my limit of patient broken, now u see when i get control by feelings, u see
how crazy im rn, ohh bf should protect gf? huh i start to hate all girls,
u think guy no feelings ah? u think guy all same ah? u think guy should
the one who must say sorry? im completely in perfect feelings rn hahaha
i lost people who i love, i get no respect n blame, the feelings of always
get sadness than happiness, must pretend be ok n be normal, what again?
got somemore i must got? why, why im the one should be this pain.. why
i dont get happiness? cause i did things tht i hurt? i just want run away again..
i dont want to meet the people i know now, i dont want n want to have new life
again.. i dont want know the people i know rn, i want run away n gone..
must good, if i dont have feelings.. must it good i dont have any feelings..
see myself rn.. idk myself anymore.. i dont have anyone.. beside me..
i always say people " i will always be here for u " but look at me..
hahahaha, just ghost have.. how i wish i can meet myself.. n always
take of myself.. maybe god want to punish me.. i hurt all person alot..
i hurt all of them.. i hurt everything.. just punish me.. just blame me..
just leave me.. i have no life.. i know who myself.. im tired..
i better just live with my own live that r black n white.. im waiting..
im waiting for god answer.. im used by get hurt, pain, sad, all negative...
no one will like listen to my feelings.. i dont have anyone to tell my feelings
even got.. i dont want to tell it.. better i keep n hide it.. goodnight..
goodluck for all pt3 candidates for tmr.. wish u all the best~
new past
